My favorite gift this season is one that really keeps on giving. Click here to go to Priscilla Woolworth’s site for the world’s finest fly swatter. Not only does it keep the little buggers at bay, it’s extremely cute, and you can also use it to swat badly behaving relatives at your upcoming holiday events.

I’m keeping mine handy to swat my husband’s hand when he reaches for his sixth piece of chocolate roll on Christmas night. I will also let loose on my daughter when she tries to make off with my new red sweater. It will morph into a dog swatter when Oliver opens his jaws to partake of the Christmas tenderloin, and Aunt Lucy will be sorry when she tries to pour her fourth glass of eggnog. If my sister-in-law indicates displeasure with my gift, whack. If anyone gives an Ab-O-Cizer for Christmas, smack.

See, this thing has infinite uses. Buy one and swat your way through December.

The photo in this post features my dog, Oliver, reclining before the Christmas tree. The reason he looks so content, full of yuletide glory, is because he just ate most of the ornaments that were so carefully hung on the tree the day before.

I caught him just in time to save a hand-creweled mini-stocking, which he spat out in response to my curse words. I re-hung it, much higher up, along with any other ornaments in pooch range, so the bare bottom half of the tree now looks slightly ridiculous, like it forgot its pants.

Luckily, Oliver did not choose to chew the Christmas lights, because they are very special this year. They are LED lights, and I’ve been bragging about them all over town.

LED stands for, uh, I forget what, except the D is for diode, but the point is, they are energy-efficient, reducing your Christmas carbon footprint (or in Oliver’s case, pawprint) by a whole lot. They last FOREVER; they will still be twinkiling after the apocalypse. And cute? You can see in the photo, behind the silhouette of Mr. Destructo.

You can get these lights, if you haven’t already committed to the other kind (SO last century) at www.priscillawoolworth.com for about $16 a strand. Priscilla Woolworth is the proprietor of this online store that sells lots of fabulous green stuff, like reusable water bottles, photo albums made of recycled plastic, and solar task lights. If you haven’t already bought your boyfriend a yodeling pickle, go buy him a head scratcher at Priscilla’s for $4 and he will love you forever.

I was going to buy Oliver a head scratcher but after the episode with the tree, that dog is getting coal.